Unknowable

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“I learned not to trust people; I learned not to believe what they say but to watch what they do. I learned to suspect that anyone is capable of living a lie. I came to believe that other people- even when you think you know them well- are ultimately unknowable”

~Lynn Barber


*Photo Credits: Richard Jean-Louis

‘Perfect’

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“He said to me, ‘you’re perfect,

and I want you to be mine.’

But I felt I wasn’t worthy,

and to be perfect, I need time.

 

I knew it would  be worth it,

and I could be better if I tried.

 

Then he got tired of waiting,

and I watched my chance go by.”

~Lang Leav


*Photo Credits: Richard Jean-Louis

Guilty Confessions

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It’s guilty confessions time! Many of you have been waiting on this post since you voted in January’s blog post poll, so I am super excited to finally release it. This is where I confess four shameful things that I am guilty for and hope that you don’t judge me too harshly… Here we go!

1: I have typed wrong my entire life.

I actually didn’t even realize this until about two months ago when my mom pointed it out. My left hand was typing fine, but my right index finger was literally stretching to hit every letter on the other side of the keyboard. I am currently trying to break this habit after years of incorrect typing, and it is definitely not an easy task.

2: I have a childish fear of needles.

This is painful to admit, but I am absolutely terrified of needles. Even sitting in a doctor’s office makes my body tremble, and I have cried several tears (even as a teenager) because of this childish fear.

3: I am a really bad nail biter.

I have been guilty of this for years, but it is actually much better than it use to be! Honestly, I use to bite my nails until they would bleed, so I am definitely making progress.

4: I gave my friend her birthday gift three months late.

Yes, this actually happened. I got the gift on time, but I kept leaving it at my house whenever we would see each other. I felt so bad, but I finally got the gift to her three months late.

What are you are guilty for? Can you relate to any of these things?

Photo credits: Thank you, Grandma Gayle, for capturing this awesome in-between moment when I was least expecting it.

My Survival Kit

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Lately, several people have asked me the same exact question, and I began to realize that this might make a really interesting blog post. People catch a glimpse of my overflowing list of of day-by-day tasks on my weekly planner and look at me wide-eyed…

“How do you do it all?”

My reply is always the same: “I don’t even know.” In reality, however, I guess there really is a method to manage this madness, but it is not easy! I will be completely honest and tell you that there have been many nights that I have gotten under four hours of sleep as deadlines crept up faster than expected, so I don’t want you to get the impression that I have mastered these strategies because that is far from the truth. For the most part, however, I think this survival kit has really been the reason that I have been able to “do it all,” so I thought it might be neat to share with you.

1: Staying Organized:

My agenda/weekly calendar is actually color coded so that I can quickly see the homework load for each class. I also write down the important projects, papers, quizzes, and exams for that week in a black pen and highlight it in bright yellow so that I don’t accidentally miss them or forget to study. My friends think I am a bit crazy, but I actually color code my notes as well by the units or lectures.

2: Managing Time:

I always go to the campus library at least 30 min (sometimes even an hour) before my class begins to get a head start on homework for that day. I use every free moment that I have to get things done, so I frequently work Friday nights or even weekends as well. Time management is extremely important, so use extra time to your advantage!

3: Routine:

I also think following a routine helps me a lot because my body has gotten use to the wake/sleep times. This doesn’t mean that I am never tired, but it just means that I don’t feel like a walking zombie everyday because my body has gotten into a relatively consistent schedule.

4: Support:

Family and friends have significantly influenced me to keep working hard because I know they believe in me. This ultimately helps me believe in myself too, and it really does feel good to have someone there to encourage me through difficult times with a “you can do it!” attitude.

I also wanted to let you all know that I am scheduled to get my braces off on March 15!!!

I hope that you enjoyed this post, and thanks for reading!

How do YOU manage your schedule? Would you like to know my tips for studying late at night without getting tired? What was it like to get your braces off? 

Taking Flight

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During a live performance, nothing is promised, and the audience experiences something new each time the curtain rises. They are able to witness the real-time mishaps and slips that cannot be undone or edited out. Each show is simply an unparalleled mystery to both the dancers and audience members because it is never certain what the outcome will be regardless of the repeated choreography. Even though dancers try to maintain a professional image, we are just like the people in the darkened theater clutching tickets in their palms. We make mistakes. We fall. We have off days just like everybody else. No matter how hard we strive for perfection, we will never be flawless, and that is reality.

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Saturday, we took Flight, a guest-choreographed modern piece, downtown with peacock feathers perched delicately in our hair. To be honest, I am quite disappointed with my performance. It was an incredibly stressful night as things continuously went wrong, and I had to endure that defeated feeling as I took a bow. This piece will be performed again later this season, so I am hoping that we can redeem ourselves. As of right now, we must move on because it is going to be a busy week in the studio as we prepare for Alice in Wonderland in three weeks! I will not waste any more time thinking about the past. We have a ballet to learn. 🙂

Quote of the day!

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“Stressed spelled backwards is desserts. Coincidence? I think not!”

~Unknown

What can I say?

“It’s just another manic Monday”!

~The Bangles